She’s a dreamer, alright.

She wants to:

Be a big kid. Decked out in Ryan’s clothes from head to toe…including boxers.

Drive. She’s drawn to anything with wheels!

Collect sparkly shoes. She claims, its the only way to, “Walk Fancy”.

Get Married. Even a bath towel will do for a veil, in a pinch!

Be a Mama. She loves to rock her little sisters.

Good Golly Miss Molly – don’t forget to be my baby as long as you live!!!!!

Love,

Jess

I’ve been searching for the perfect remedy for clutter, a balance in work & parenthood, and the answer for how God works in my life. Project after project, prayer after prayer, plan after plan..searching.

But, simplicity found me. Or maybe, it was there all along and I just opened my eyes to see it standing under my nose.

I have come to find simplicity means something different to everyone. How to do you view “simplicity”?

Sewing your own clothes or buying the latest fashions off the rack? Paying bills online or sending them in the mail with, gasp, a stamp? Using all home grown organics or shopping with a grocery delivery service?

My simplicity is this: I live in a complex world in failing body with a forgiven soul. I have a dynamic family, a creative bug and a gift for loving my kids. I think of gratitude, hope for grace and a linger in peace (even in the orchestrated chaos that is the current state of my family).

My projects, prayers and plans can all change. There is no formula. Seek simplicity, look to God, and be grateful for what challenges you and what gives you peace.

Love,

Jess

My days are all blending together. Thank goodness for my breakfast meal plan or I’d have to really question what day I’m living in.

Parks, meals, tears, farts, laughs about farts, more meals, toys, worship, books, worries, prayers, kisses, sleep, putting sleepy kids back to bed after sneaking in my bed, folding oh.my.word. the folding, joys, finances, time shared…

You get the idea.

I have big mushy life ingredients that mash together in a soup of treasured memories, present day routine & dreams for the future. Fluid yet chunky & good for the soul. Yes, I did just compare my life to soup. Can we move on now? Okay.

Some days stand out. You’d think it was the important days like the State Fair or Christmas. But, it’s always the ordinary days that stick with me.

• Like the time we declared it a pajama day and went to bed in the same p.j.s that we had on all day.
• When Molly found the tooth paste and used it as “paint” all over the bathroom walls, floors and doors.
• Or the time we spent every quarter we find in the van to buy ice cream cones at McDonald’s.

Yesterday was one such day. It started like any typical day (see the beginning of this post).

Then, we went upstairs to begin weekly allowance earning chores.

Ryan got right to work. Molly wandered in and out of the rooms, helping with chores, whenever she felt like it was her turn to use the squirt bottle. The babies slept.

Bathroom clean. Check. Bed made and stuffed animals straightened. Check. Laundry put away. Check. Extra helper chore. Check.

Next, it was time for errands.

After the babies were awake and fed again, we scurried toward the van in five different directions.

1. Ryan went straight for his bicycle and rode around the driveway.
2. Molly tried to find her shoes, bless her, she could only find one shoe of every pair she had.
3. Claire rolled around on a blanket in the entryway.
4. Leah rested, next to Claire, trying to put her thumb into her sister’s mouth.
5. I went to the kitchen, even though I had declared it was already time to leave,  to pack a lunch and pour more bottles. I had just realized it was already noon. Hungry babies and kids + errands in the van = not bliss.

In the van. Check. Can I please put “Get In The Van” on my to do list just so I can cross it off?  WAIT! Where’s my coffee? Oh yea, my to-go mug was on a shelf in the bathroom. Not sure when or why it was put there. None the less, I fly back upstairs to grab it, then, of course, reheat it in the microwave.

Two bank trips. Drive through, of course. The first bank was out of stickers and suckers. Really? Where is the manager? Is there not a Walgreen’s down the street? Buy some. Customer service these days. Of course, I don’t complain to the kids.

Instead, I try to bellow to the back of the van, some lesson to Molly about not getting a sticker because, “Little mouths shouldn’t say big hateful words!” (like, “I hate my car seat!”) Meanwhile, telling Ryan that the next bank will probably have a sucker for him, without letting Molly realize the only reason she’s not getting a sticker or sucker is because the first bank was out off them.

The second bank dutifully sent two suckers through the tube. I was sweet-talked into handing them over with promises from my kids to, “Never be mean their whole lives, to me or each other, ever again!”

Off to the park…part 2 coming soon.

Love,

Jess

Proverbs 31: 25 a

²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity

Wake up. Splash water on my face. Feed someone. Kiss someone. Dress someone. Brew coffee. Wipe something. Remind someone. Hug someone. Drink coffee. Remind someone again. Feed someone else. Feed the first someone again. Wipe something else from yesterday. Hide in bathroom. Check email from my mobile phone while hidden in bathroom. Splash more water on my face. Reheat coffee.

Really Wake Up.

Then the day starts. Some point between wiping someone and wiping something, I dress myself with strength and dignity. When my feet hit the ground each morning, I want all the evil forces out there to say,

“Oh, crap! She’s up!”

But where does it end? How will I get through another day of life with my circumstances?

Will I  rumple into a ball from defeat? (rumple is like an ishy way of making a ball)

Will I ruffle into a ball from success? (ruffle is like a pretty way of making a ball)

Cause let’s face it, I’m going to end up in a ball. Preferably, a cozy place, next to my husband in front of a good movie or my laptop computer screen. Remember, I said my days are long? Falling into bed is not a figure of speech in my life. It’s the truth.

Let’s look at today. Some funny, strength growing things happened today. pause. I knew this would happen. I can’t remember the specifics about today. pause again. pray.

I’ll be back tomorrow with a look at my day. I am too rumpled and ruffled to write.

Love,

Jess

My days might look like this:

Clean clothes to fold (3 full loads per day)

Kids to direct (too many “get off your sister” and/or “stop yelling” directions to count)

Dishes to wash (2 dishwasher loads per day)

Outdoor toy sprawl (one garage stall space full)

Ah, yes. Diapers! (5-6 changes a day X 2)

But, my life looks like this:

My days are numbered but my soul will live on forever. – JEM

Things no one ever told me before I became a mom:

• I’d catch spit up with my bare hands.
• I’d wear a princess crown for more than 2 hours after dress up time was over.
• I’d learn how to clean melted red crayon out of my dryer.
• I’d laugh so much at my kids, I’d cry.
• I’d consider a well made grilled cheese sandwich one of life’s greatest accomplishments.
• I’d see my baby grow before my very eyes.
• I’d wonder what life would be like without kids.
• I’d feel my heart actually grow larger.
• I’d never be the same.

Love,

Jess

Molly. My little girl increased her vocabulary to include “Actually”, “Never mind”, and “What the heck?”

Ryan. My boy has thrown himself into a world of legos, video games and collections of bouncy balls, cards, & comic books.

The days are long. The days of whining, sticky, smelly, funny, angry, rowdy, loving, quiet, sleepy, loud, active, creative, sassy, sweet children hanging from every limb are long.  But, the months jet past like a movie in fast forward.

As life marches on, I long for time with my kids to slow down. The days of singing yet another round of Itsy-Bitsy spider, soothing cries for extra an tuck-in at night and having all my kiddos under the same roof will all too soon seem like a distant luxury.

Here’s to living in the moment and praying to God I’ll remember any of it at all!

Love,

Jess

photo credit

My Birthday

I’d love to have some powerful words to express about the last 30 years or the next 30 years.

But really, right now I’m trying to get my almost 2 year old out of her Dad’s night stand (which stores all sorts of man treasures like M-80s, candy, watches, shoe laces, cologne, earplugs and video games)

&

trying to ignore the “Mom, I think there is a huge problem down here [in the living room], um…nevermind!”

So until my brilliant, thought provoking insights about life come tumbling out…I’ll be eating cupcakes!!!

Have a great weekend! I’ll be back next week, much older and wiser!

Love,

Messy Jessy

My life is hurdling by, at a rate that is most typical. (at least to a young family with two kids and two on the way)

Long days that push my strength limits.

Longer nights that pull at my eye lids.

Fast weeks that provide much change or little change at all.

Motor months that feel like a splash of yearly repeated Holidays.

Blink-able years.

So yes, I do try and take it all in, blink by blink it goes on. All the while trying to figure out what “it all” really is anyway.

I would like to remember the endless knock-knock jokes, the ou-wies shown with pride, the yelling, the cuddling, the everything the “it all” means.

I would like to remember the feeling of being held by a loving God during laundry mountains, financial pressures, morning sickness, and sibling issues in my children and this-house-is-too-small agreements with my beloved Neat Pete.

Things will be different. Places will change. Priorities will shift.

My naturally brunette hair will be a distant memory.

My desire for alone time will be met and feel incredibly quiet.

My heart will be consumed as I balance my time taking care of my grand babies and aging parents.

But while I can, I embrace the moment {Just a blink. Just a breath. Just a stitch.} knowing I am living in tomorrow’s memories.

It’s amazing what a neighborhood drainage ditch can be to anyone with an imagination.

Love,

Messy Jessy

PS The twins are at 14 weeks and I am starting to turn a corner in my all-day sickness. yes! Though I am continuing my Unisom and B6 treatment for now. Thanks for those of you that inquired!

]]> http://justablink.com/2009/05/blinking-once-again/feed/ 2 http://justablink.com/2009/03/internet-sminternet/ http://justablink.com/2009/03/internet-sminternet/#comments Wed, 01 Apr 2009 03:33:49 +0000 Jessica http://justablink.com/?p=2296 Unplugging with A Soft Place to Land

Kimba from ASPTL invited her blogging community to unplug (go without computer time) last Friday and report back what we found.

Due to my early days of baby growing, my nausea and fatigue have guided me to a week or more of being unplugged.

I am back. But, it begs the question…

What did I do?

• I disappeared from facebook
• I left my email inbox full
• My Google Reader blog feeds (that I read daily) are stacked up to 250
• My blog writing fell of a cliff
• Photography…I have a camera?

What did I learn?

• Life happens all around me all time whether I capture it, remember it or even share it or not.
• Life happens on the internet (blogs, social media, email) with or without me around.
• I missed the daily dose of connectivity but felt a relief from it as well.
• I learned to guide my days by moments I got to have with my kids rather than by moments I got to have without them.

Where do I go from here?

I will let go of guilt and enjoy my time on the computer. The Internet, as I interact with it, is a great source of learning on a variety of levels.

How else will I know if so-and-so’s ultra-sound predicts a 10 baby? OR When my MOPS table is signed-up to bring food? OR How a good friend is doing at the Hospital with her sick baby?

Not to mention, what types of organizational, decoration-al and recreational ideas I absorb every week!

The Goodness of being Plugged In

• Reading blogs is like earning continuing education credits
• Writing posts is like a personal growth workshop or therapy
• Sharing status updates is what a cup of coffee together or chatting over the clothes line used to be
• Uploading digital photos with captions has become the new baby-book or scrapbook

P.S. I did give up checking my blog stats for Lent.

As my last post outlined, I’m pregnant! Kid number 3 is coming this Fall.

But, right now, I am living under a rock. Early bedtimes are stealing my blogging time!

My camera and my computer keyboard are collecting dust.

I will be back…closet reveals, darling kids, life ramblings, and spring decor are around the corner.